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I am so sorry it has taken so long for me to do this....this seems to be one of the harder jobs. For how do I put into words what Dillon was, how he made a positive influnce on everyone he touched, what a profound effect he had on my life, and how very much we loved him. The words to describe him are not powerful enough. On his headstone I had engraved "He knew so few, but touched so many" .......how very true that statement really is. I have combined several writting, and added some for his memorial page, but they dont measure up to what he really meant to me. There are no words for that. He touched mine and my familys lives and we will never be the same. We will never not miss him. We are no longer complete. He took part of us with him, and left all of us a big part of him in our hearts. The first one I wrote at Christmas time before he died .
TIRED
Sometimes we
are so tired, we feel we cant go on, but God has always given us everything
we needed and never more than we can handle, though sometimes it feels
that way. Our son has helped us to become tough, yet tender. He sees life
differently than I do. Time has little meaning to him. Day or night doesnt
matter. A tickle, a new sweet taste, a new interesting sound, the crinkling
of a bag, a funny silly song....they all bring delight to his day. When
I take the time to see life this way, God is very near to me then. Dillon
doesnt speak, so I watch his face and his hands as they express his moods,
his desires, and his feelings. I have to slow down to understand him.
Sometimes his expressions are so quiet I have to listen with my heart
and try to feel what he feels. When I do I think I see life a little clearer.
Dillon lives in his own little world. We must make him conform to ours,
yet live with him in his......somewhere in the middle is what is truly
real. This experience has been the most difficult trial, and yet the deepest
pleasure of my life.
(Dawn 1998)
DILLON
With beautiful, brown eyes that sparkle and a gorgeous sunny smile that
brightens the room, Dillon happily plays with his toys in his own little
world. Unaware of the afflictions of his life, Dillon is a happy, loving,
heart-captivating, little boy. Mixed emotions bring tears to my eyes as
I watch Dillon explore his mommy's face with his little hands. Dillon
sees the world through his hands, for he is blind. With a look of wonder
on his face, Dillon runs his fingers through his mommy's long silky hair.
Dillons face registers a look of understanding when he pats his own hair,
before he reaches up to softly touch his mommy's again. As Dillon touches
his mommy's hair, eyes, nose, mouth and ears, she names each part of her
face. Then she gently touches Dillons face and slowly repeats the name
of each part again. Dillon makes many sounds but still can not talk. The
expressions of his sweet face indicate that understanding of our world
has entered his small life. Dillon has a birth defect called Septo-optic
dysplasia. Dillon is blind, and his his tempature goes very high, he also
does not produce hormones. He requires thousands of dollars a month of
medication in order to live. He takes daily hormone replacement in the
form of oral liquid, pills, nose spray, and injection. Dillon likes the
taste of his oral meds, hates the nose stuff, and rarely whimpers over
this growth hormone injections. Despite the mountians of daily medications,
frequent high temps, and trips to the hospital and doctors.....Dillon
usually has a bright sunny smile for the sound of a familar voice. Dillon's
love of music ranges form classical, to rock, to country, to rap. He hates
the wind in his face and despises the rain. The sound of the salvation
army bell brings excitement beyond belief. The crinkle of an empty shopping
bag is wonderful. Dillon loves the feel of satin or silk, but hates to
touch most fuzzy or furry things. If someone says "Good boy Dillon!" after
he accomplishes a difficult task, his face lights up with a quick radiant
smile......yet if someone says "Yea for Dillon" and claps, his little
lips quiver as his smile turns completely upside down in a frown and his
little heart breaks. My precious grandson has enriched my life tremendously.
I will never take the beauty of God's creations for granted because of
Dillon. Because of Dillon, the simple joys fo life are precious gifts.
The sound of Dillons laugher rings through the room, then echos in my
heart. In the early morning quiet before breaking dawn on January 24,
1998 as Dillon lay sleeping peacefully in his home, his guarding angel
gently cradles him in loving arms and carries Dillon to Heaven. The aching
emptiness of our arms and the pain of our breaking hearts reaches the
core of our beings. Dillon will forever be a part of our family just as
his short life continues to richly bless so many. The pain of loosing
Dillon is a small price to pay for the priceless gift of having had him
in our lives. Carole (dawn's mom)
Dillon
1-24-98
He was a beautiful baby sent down from God. We were never meant to understand
him. We were just suppose to give him lots of love. His laugh would make
your day brighter, his hugs make you warm. Dillon was an angel sent to
us on loan. He taught me to look past the surface of things and find their
true value. Dillon taught me volumes without saying a word. He was brave,
strong, beautiful and happy. God sent us this special angel and now he
has called him back again. Everyone that knew he taught them something
no one else could. Now all we can send with him is our love. Sherri (dawns
little sister) I would like to thank you all for being a part of the group.
For reading my ramblings, and understanding them!!!.....only this crazy
group can... for being my friends, and my main sanity most days for the
past year. You have been with me through the most difficult times and
happiest times of my life.
My love to everyone,
Dawn Rollins
Dillon and his sister Danielle
